"You No you in Africa"

When

You produce a R50 note instead of your driver's license when stopped by a traffic officer.
You can do your monthly shopping on the pavement.
You have to hire a security guard every time you park your car.
You can count the national soccer team's scores with no fingers.
Hijacking cars is a profession.
You can pay your tuition fees by holding up a sign at a traffic light.
The petrol in your tank may be worth more than your car.
More people vote in a local reality TV show, than in a local election.
People have the most wonderful names: Christmas, Goodwill, Pretty, Office, Wednesday, Blessing, Brilliant, Gift, Given, Letters, Beauty.
"Now-Now" can mean anything from a minute to a month.
You continue to wait after a traffic light has turned green to make way for taxis traveling in the opposite direction.
Traveling at 120 km/h you are the slowest car on the highway.
You're genuinely and pleasantly surprised whenever you find your car parked where you left it.
The last time you visited the coast you paid more in speeding fines and toll fees than you did for the entire holiday.
You paint your car's registration number on the roof.
Only half of your mail is guaranteed to reach its destination.
You have to take your own linen if you are admitted to a government hospital.
You dial a toll-free number and nobody answers.
You have to prove that you don't need a loan to get one.
Prisoners go on strike.