Monday, July 15, 2013

Myron and the tax man

MYRON Greenberg, a wealthy S.A. businessman receives a letter from SARS advising him that he is about to be audited. 

This really upsets him, so he calls his Accountant.
MYRON: (pleading): 
“Why are they doing to me? Why are they doing this to me?”
 (calming); “Myron, don’t worry about it. I’ve got all the receipts, the account is up to date, it’s no problem.But let me give you a bit of advice. When you go to the Audit, make a bad impression.Wear the crummiest, dirtiest clothes you’ve got.  Have holes in your shoes, rippedpants and look shabby .   I mean really look terrible, because if they have a little
sympathy, they’ll go easy on you.

Then Myron called his Lawyer  . His Lawyer said:
  “MYRON it’s no problem, I’m sure
they got the receipts, I’m sure everything is up to date, you’ve got a great accountant,
Ken Scher, don’t worry about it.   Let me give you a tip. When you go to the Audit, it’s
very important that you make a good impression.  Wear your best suit, and your shirt
with a silk tie and cuff links and shine your shoes, look like somebody.
Because if you look like a somebody they respect you and will go easy on you.”
And now he’s torn.  So he goes to see his RABBI and he told the Rabbi the story.

“Myron, it reminds me of sometimes when I perform a wedding. The bride’s
father will tell his daughter that on her wedding night, to wear a nightgown with a
high collar and long sleeves and a full-length robe... cover up, you know, be a little
demure. But the mother says, ‘Don’t be silly. Wear a low cut“negligee” with the cleavage
sticking out --- look a little sexy’

       …. and Myron I will say to you just like I say to the Bride on her wedding night,
it makes no difference what you wear, you’re gonna get fucked”…. 

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