Thursday, June 13, 2013

An old farmer and a clever lawyer do battle

One lawyer who should have ducked

A big-city, Johanesburg lawyer went duck hunting in the bush near the small rural Natal town of Vryheid.  He shot  and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other  side of a  fence.  As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up in his pickup and asked him what he was doing. The lawyer responded, "I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it."  

The old farmer replied. "This is my property, and you are not coming over here." The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the biggest and best trial attorneys in South Africa and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own." The old farmer smiled and said, Apparently, you don't know how we do things in the Natal bush. We settle small disagreements like this with the
Natal Three-Kick Rule."

The lawyer asked, "What is the Natal three-Kick Rule?" The Farmer replied. "Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up."

The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old farmer. He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old farmer slowly climbed out of the pickup and walked up to the city feller. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. His second kick nearly wiped the man's nose off his face. The poor lawyer was flat on his belly when the
farmer's third kick to a kidney nearly caused him to give up.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet and said, "Okay, you old coot now it's my turn."

The farmer smiled and said, "Naw, I give up...... You can have the duck."