Finally, the true story as told by Hillary to world leaders…....
Some years ago President Clinton was hosting a state dinner when, at the last minute, his regular cook fell ill, and they had to get a replacement on short notice.
The fellow arrived and turned out to be a very grubby-looking man named Jon.
The President voiced his concerns to his Chief of Staff but was told that this was the best they could do on such short notice.
Just before the meal, the President noticed the cook sticking his finger in the soup to taste it and again complained to the Chief Of Staff, but he was told that this man was supposed to be a very good chef.
The meal went okay, but the President was sure that the soup tasted a little funny.
By the time dessert came, he was starting to have stomach cramps and nausea.
It was getting worse and worse until finally the President had to excuse himself from the dinner to look for the bathroom. Passing through the kitchen, he caught sight of the cook, Jon, scratching his rear end, which made him feel even worse.
By now, the President was desperately ill with violent cramps and was so disorientated that he couldn’t remember which door led to the bathroom.
He was on the verge of passing out from the pain and in fear of blasting in his pants, when he finally found a door that opened.
As he unzipped his trousers and ran in, he realized to his horror that he had stumbled into Monica Lewinsky’s office with his trousers around his knees.
As he was just about to pass out, she bent over him and heard the President whisper in a barely audible voice, “Sack my cook.”
That friends is how the whole misunderstanding occurred and the rest is history.
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
SEXPO 2011 a huge sucess this year
People came from far and wide to attend what can only be described as the ultimate celebration of the sexually liberated in South Africa. This year’s SEXPO held at Gallagher Estate drew crowds from all walks of life and offered them a variety of sensual and sexual entertainment and goods.
By Sunday afternoon, more than 61 000 people had made their way through the various halls of products and entertainment ranging from decadent lingerie to the downright naughty guilty pleasures.
Some of the highlights of the weekend included the amateur strip shows where a few brave SEXPO goers bared all in front of the crowd. Former Miss Nude Australia Miss Suzie Q and her partner Toby J delivered a sensual aerial acrobatic show while the tattooed rock chick Michelle “Bombshell” McGee left many SEXPO goers slack-jawed and entertained with her hardcore pole dancing routine.
While some couples got hitched at the Vegas-style chapel.Every year the Reverend Daniel Brits looks forward to the Sexpo.It’s the time of year when the 58-year-old minister from Cape Town gets to marry South Africans in a place few would imagine – the country’s biggest sex convention.
By Sunday afternoon, more than 61 000 people had made their way through the various halls of products and entertainment ranging from decadent lingerie to the downright naughty guilty pleasures.
Some of the highlights of the weekend included the amateur strip shows where a few brave SEXPO goers bared all in front of the crowd. Former Miss Nude Australia Miss Suzie Q and her partner Toby J delivered a sensual aerial acrobatic show while the tattooed rock chick Michelle “Bombshell” McGee left many SEXPO goers slack-jawed and entertained with her hardcore pole dancing routine.
Michelle McGee
Another firm favourite of this year’s exhibition, Australian hypnotist Mark Anthony’s show HypNaughty brought out the hidden naughty side of crowd participants. “I love performing at SEXPO and the South African audiences are always fun and very open minded,” said Anthony.
Suzie Q miss nude Australia
While some couples got hitched at the Vegas-style chapel.Every year the Reverend Daniel Brits looks forward to the Sexpo.It’s the time of year when the 58-year-old minister from Cape Town gets to marry South Africans in a place few would imagine – the country’s biggest sex convention.
Brits runs the Love Chapel at the Sexpo and has been part of the convention since it was first established six years ago. "I already have two couples who have booked with me for Saturday (today) – it’s very exciting,” said Brits. “One couple is of the same sex and the other is of different sex (sic). The nice thing about marrying people at the Sexpo is that I marry open-minded couples who are of the new generation,” he said.
Although he says he isn’t perturbed, he has been harshly criticised for taking his ministry to Sexpo.
Other visitors got a taste of the latest trends in lingerie, adult toys, products ranging from massage oils to decadent food and drinks and all in an environment that said, “Hey, it’s OK, everyone does it and there’s no shame in enjoying sex and sensuality.”
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
What the well dressed female Springboks Rugby supporter should wear
Just perfect people I think all the Lady's should
comply with this dress code what are your thoughts?
Old people rock check this job application
Wal Mart Applicant revealed...Below is an actual job application from a 75 year old senior citizen who solicited the help of his friends to fill it in and then submitted it to Walmart in California . They hired him because he was funny.....
Job Application
NAME: Kenneth Way (Grumpy Old Bastard)
SEX: Not lately, but I am looking for the right woman (or at least one who
will cooperate)
DESIRED POSITION: Company President or Vice President. But seriously,
whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be
applying here in the first place
DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz
style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can
haggle.
EDUCATION: Yes.
LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.
PREVIOUS SALARY: A lot less than I'm worth.
MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and
post-it notes.
REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.
HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.
PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m. Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.
DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more
intimate environment .
MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be
here?
DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU
FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 lbs.?: Of what?
DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be
'Do you have a car that runs?'
HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may
already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing House Sweepstakes, so they
tell me.
DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job - no! On my breaks - yes!
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?:
Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blond
supermodel who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually,
I'd like to be doing that now.
NEAREST RELATIVE: 7 miles
DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST
OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Oh yes, absolutely.
Job Application
NAME: Kenneth Way (Grumpy Old Bastard)
SEX: Not lately, but I am looking for the right woman (or at least one who
will cooperate)
DESIRED POSITION: Company President or Vice President. But seriously,
whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be
applying here in the first place
DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz
style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can
haggle.
EDUCATION: Yes.
LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.
PREVIOUS SALARY: A lot less than I'm worth.
MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and
post-it notes.
REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.
HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.
PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m. Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.
DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more
intimate environment .
MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be
here?
DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU
FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 lbs.?: Of what?
DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be
'Do you have a car that runs?'
HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may
already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing House Sweepstakes, so they
tell me.
DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job - no! On my breaks - yes!
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?:
Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blond
supermodel who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually,
I'd like to be doing that now.
NEAREST RELATIVE: 7 miles
DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST
OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Oh yes, absolutely.
There is no substitute for experience
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