Blonde caught for speeding by traffic officer

Blondes are not as dumb as you might think guys

Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.

Woman: Oh, I see.

Officer: Can I see your license please?

Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.

Officer: Don't have one?

Woman: Lost it 4 times for drunk driving.

Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

Woman: I can't do that.

Officer: Why not?

Woman: I stole this car.

Officer: Stole it?

Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Officer: You what?

Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see. The Officer looks at the woman, slowly backs away to his car, and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle
please!

The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Woman: Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Woman: Murdered the owner?

Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?

Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.

The first officer is stunned.

Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer snaps open the clutch purse and examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

Woman: Betcha the lying bastard told you I was speeding too.

No Bake Fridge tart yummy yummy

Yummy Yummy Fridge Tart

Quick and easy

Ingredients:

1 (128 g) packet lemon jelly (usually to make up to 570ml or 1 pint jelly)

1 (405 g) can condensed milk

500 g yogurt, your chosen flavour

10 digestive biscuits or 10 graham crackers

1 tablespoon butter or 1 tablespoon margarine, melted

Directions:

1 Crush the biscuits- I put them in a plastic bag and crush with a rolling pin.

2 Add the melted butter, mix well and press hard into the bottom of your pie dish.

3 Refrigerate for 1 hour.

4 Make up the jelly packet with only HALF the liquid (to make about 285ml jelly).

5 Add the condensed milk FIRST and stir.

6 Add the yoghurt and stir. 

7 Pour onto the chilled biscuit base and refrigerate immediately for 1 hour.

8 Decorate if desired.

9 You can double the mix by using gelatine, mixed with half the recommended water, a 300g carton of cream cheese and another 500g yogurt.

Mars Lander Curiosity sends back amazing pics

 Amazing Pics from the Red Planet

 These guys must of watched movies like "Mars Attacks"

and "District 9"

Oscar Pistorius runs kindest race of all

South Africa's own Olympian

Oscar Pistorius and Ellie

Click on picks for full size

He has been called the fastest man on no legs. But Oscar 'Blade Runner' Pistorius got a run for his money when five-year-old Ellie Challis challenged him to a race on their bionic feet. Paralympian Pistorius, world record holder for double amputees at 100, 200 and 400 metres, may have made some allowance for age and the fact that Ellie's blades were fitted only last month. But she had clearly learned quicker than he bargained for Ellie crossed the line first in all four of their 15-metre races. The youngster, from Little Clacton, Essex, lost her hands and lower legs after contracting meningitis at 16 months. 

Ellie races with Oscar Pistorious in this May 17, photo.

Ellie having won all three of there fifteen meter races is over the moon 

shows you how one act of kindness can bring so much joy

HOW Important is Eye Makeup?

IT'S VERY IMPORTANT THAT GUYS READ THIS TOO...JUST SO THEY KNOW TO WHAT EXTREMES WOMEN WILL GO TO ATTRACT THEM.

Ladies, the best way to attract a man is with your eyes. That's why it's so important to have your eye makeup perfectly applied. Remember, if it weren't for the excellent application of proper eye makeup this young lady probably wouldn't get a second look from most guys...

I could be wrong – I’ve been 

wrong before!