It was time for Father John's Saturday night bath and young
Sister Magdalene Edwards had prepared the bath water and towels just the way
the old nun had instructed. Sister Magdalene Edwards was also instructed not to
look at Fr. John's nakedness if she could help it, do whatever he told her to
do, and pray.
The next morning the old nun asked Sister Magdalene how the
Saturday night bath had done. "Oh, sister," said the young nun
dreamily. "I've been saved." "Saved? And how did that fine thing
come about?" asked the old nun. "Well, when Fr. John was soaking in
the tub, he asked me to wash him, and while I was washing him he guided my hand
down between his legs where he said the Lord keeps the Key to Heaven."
"Did he now," said the old nun evenly. Sister
Magdalene continued, "And Fr. John said that if the Key to Heaven fit my
lock, the portals of Heaven would be opened to me and I would be assured of
salvation and eternal peace. And then Father John guided his Key to Heaven into
my lock."
"Is that a fact," said the old nun even more
evenly. "At first it hurt terribly, but Fr. John said the pathway to salvation
was often painful and that the glory of God would soon swell my heart with
ecstasy. And it did, it felt so good being saved."
"That wicked old Devil," said the old nun.
"He told me it was Gabriel's Horn, and I've been blowing it for 40
years!"
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